Little Miss Supermodel

My 7-year-old daughter is a self-described "tom-girl" and "girly girl" all rolled into one. I call her Ellie Mae Clampett because she loves all critters great and small.

She has never ever been afraid to pet a stingray or sturgeon at the aquarium. She proudly posed for a picture holding a small alligator in Natchidotches, LA. Anything fluffy, scaly or slimy is beautiful in her eyes.

Once when we were replacing the lining on the pool, somebody found the largest spotted bullfrog I had ever seen in the wild. It stretched from my middle finger to my elbow. That's an eyeball estimate because I was not about to get that close to a vicious, blood sucking amphibian but Lucy was fascinated. She immediately plucked it from the man's hand and galloped over to show me. On the way over she kissed it a few times. As I threw up in my mouth a bit and tried not to scream like a scared sissy, I marveled at her bravery and loving spirit.

On the other hand, she's lately become obsessed with super models and their suggestive poses. She came into my room and pulled up her shirt, sucked in her stomach and stated that this was a supermodel tummy and then she let out her breath and told me that her tummy was a kid's supermodel tummy. Then she asked me if hers was good kid's super model tummy.

Later at bath time as she was getting undressed

Lucy: "It's okay if supermodels take pictures with no clothes on because they do this." She strikes a demure pose with her hands placed strategically over her nonexistent chest and her legs crossed.

Me: "Why are you so interested in models. I thought you wanted to be a vet."

Lucy: "I DO want to be a vet but what if we're walking down the street and a man with a modeling business tells me I should be a super model?"

Me: "You tell him thank you but you've got better things to do - like school."

Lucy: "But what if he tells me I HAVE to do it because I'm so beautiful?"

Me: "We'll figure it out when it happens. Bathe!"

Lucy: ( insistent)"But he says I have to."

Me: (Taking advantage of a quality learning/ character building moment)"Do you want to do that? I think it's more important to go to school. I'd rather you be smart and kind. You're already beautiful. You don't have to prove it and I never want you to do something like that just because someone says you have to. You don't!"

Lucy: "This is how a supermodel poses in a bathtub." She sucks in her cheeks and poses on her side making sure to cover up certain body parts and looks vapidly off into space.

Me: "Guess what, I'd better not ever catch you posing naked (nekkid)! Think about school!"

I remember wanting to be plucked out of obscurity by someone saying I just had to come with them because I was so special/ beautiful/ talented. I hope she always feels so confident about herself because she is beautiful and wonderful but if I ever see her in some pictures, naked as a lima bean, there's going to be hell to pay or at least a lot of money involved!