Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Take me to your plastic surgeon

What has happened to everybody's face? Well, maybe not everybody's face but Hollywood faces and rich lady faces? It's like women of a certain age with means are morphing into other worldly creatures and listen up, they are taking over.

They have listless, impossibly doe-eyed eyes that don't shut completely. The better to peer into your soul and steal it with. They have potruding, razor-sharp cheeks bones that have been lifted to new heights. The better to shred your self confidence with. Their skin is smooth and has a phosphorescent glow from so much glycolic acid. The better to spot others like them so they can start a new colony on earth. Their lips are pouty and plump. The better to suck out negative thoughts from people who wonder if that look is a little too over the top.


Prime examples of the new E.T. look are:

Nicole Kidman: weirdly pixie-ish


Janice Dickinson: evil super model weird


Joan Rivers: just plain wrong and weird


Melissa Rivers: following in her mother's footstep's weird


All the Desperate Housewives: weird, weird, weird and desperately weird

Even Paris Hilton is weirdly hot. Is that pout of her's real? It was such a relief to see Meryl Streep on the Golden Globes. She looked normal and beautiful - So did America Ferrara (?) and whoever Jennifer Lopez goes to is doing a great job. She's beautiful without looking crazy.


See, if Hollywood and the rich are doing these things to their faces it won't be long until it reaches the masses. Imagine a country where all the women have the same expressionless face. Is this just a new way of keeping women down - by using vanity to keep us from speaking out and using our voices? When you speak out, you frown and that causes wrinkles.

I watched Taxi Driver the other night and I noticed how the 1970's standard of beauty is so different from today's. It doesn't even match up. Cybill Shepard is georgous but she has thin lips, a long nose and by today's standards - large hips. If some Hollywood executive were casting this movie today, he would probably get someone like Scarlet Johanssen who is beautiful. She has the pouty lips, large breasts and no hips that are in vogue. Robert DeNiro would probably still be cast in his role at the same age he is now.

I'm not saying all plastic surgery is bad. I had a breast augmentation 13 years ago but that was different because that was me and we're not talking about me and if you could have seen how flat I was you would have contributed to the fund. But enough about me, I'm making a point about other dillusional people. All I'm saying is that aliens have landed and they all go to the same plastic surgeon.

2 comments:

Camellia said...

Thanks. I needed that. And you are right about Robert DiNiro. Men get to pretend their hotties forever. Well, hottie he really wasn't on taxi driver. But women, now I especially like the lopsided botoxed lips look. It's so....needy. And funny. And so even though I look like a Granny, my lips match friendly. Cybill Shepherd...wonder what she looks like now. She is just my age. Oh...the first image I found. http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://static.sky.com/images/pictures/1242179.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.sky.com/showbiz/article/0,,50001-1152572,00.html&h=180&w=180&sz=7&tbnid=Z089KGJeBMs_8M:&tbnh=101&tbnw=101&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dcybill%2Bshepherd&start=1&sa=X&oi=images&ct=image&cd=1 Can't get there? Too bad, because I love this picture.

John Rose said...

Speaking as a guy... I find this post extremely truthful. The standard of beauty has turned into some sort of strange plasticlike android transvestite robot thing. No one seems to have personal character anymore. The last good-looking woman I've seen in the media was Lucy Lawless--hope SHE hasn't carved her face up lately.